Hungry for Words: Mostly Japanese

Graduation Photo

(Yes I know, another long pause between posts. Still very busy with life and house-hunting.)

Today's word is 卒業　(そつぎょう　sotsugyou). It means graduation.

The verb, to graduate, is 卒業する　(そつぎょうする　sotsugyousuru).

And the graduation ceremony itself is 卒業式　(そつぎょうしき　sotsugyoushiki).

In Japan, the school year starts in April and ends in March. So, now is the time for graduations. Being that Japanese people are very sentimental (despite their reputation for stoicism by some outside observers) it's a very emotional time for parents as well as students.

Although I went to school all over the place, I think that the timing of the school year in Japan makes the most sense: the year ending at the end of winter, and beginning in the spring. Late March to early April is also the time when cherry blossoms bloom throughout the country, so my memories of graduation as well as the end of the school year (and saying goodbye to my classmates), and the start of the new year (the excitement and stress of a new set of classmates and new teachers to get to know) all seem to have a backdrop of masses of pale pink blossoms.

There are a few songs traditionally sung at graduation ceremonies. In my day one of them was 『蛍の光』(ほたるのひかり　hotaru no hikari), 'The light of the firefly'. It's sung to the tune of Auld Lang Syne. I hear this is no longer sung much at graduation ceremonies anymore.

Another one is 仰げば尊し　(あおげばとおとし　aogeba toutoshi), which is a bit hard to translate, but is something like 'The respect I feel for my master (teacher)'.

However, my favorite song about graduation of all time in any language is one penned by Yumi Matsutouya, aka Yuming, one of the best singer-songwriters in Japan. It's called 卒業写真　(そつぎょうしゃしん　sotsugyou shashin), which means Graduation Photo. It's not sung at graduation ceremonies since it's way too subtle and private for such occasions.

While Yuming herself sings Graduation Photo beautifully, the song was first made by famous by Junko Yamamoto, who was the lead singer for Hi-Fi Set, a group that was very popular in the '70s to '80s. In this video you get to hear both ladies perform it - first Yuming (at the piano), then Junko Yamamoto with the Hi-Fi Set members.

And here's Junko Yamamoto singing it on her own, fairly recently I think:

Here are the lyrics with a very rough translation (which sounds way worse than the original, which is poetry):

悲しいことがあると　開く革の表紙

卒業写真のあの人は　優しい目をしてる

街で見かけた時　何も言えなかった

卒業写真の面影が　そのままだったから

人ごみに流されて　変わってゆく私を

あなたはときどき　遠くで叱って

話しかけるように　揺れる柳の下を

通った道さえ今はもう　電車から見るだけ

あの頃の生き方を　あなたは忘れないで

あなたはわたしの　青春そのもの

When I am sad, I open the leatherbound cover

In the graduation photo he has gentle eyes

When I saw him in town, I couldn't say a word

He looked just as he did in the graduation photo

As I am pushed along by the tide of people, I am changing

Please occasionally scold (my changing self) from afar

The willows that swayed as though they were talking to me

The street that I walked to school, now I only see from the train


Please don't forget the way we lived back then

Your are my youth personified

This song is all the more special to me, because I don't have any of my class albums or photos from the many schools I've attended. They got lost in the mail when I
moved to Switzerland and shipped my books from New York by sea mail. I don't remember the faces of my former classmates anymore, or even most of their names. I guess this is one of the hazards of the largely nomadic life I've lead. But when I hear this song, the feelings of wistful sadness and sweet nostalgia come back to me, in a cloud of cherry blossoms, and I can almost see my old classmates' faces again.

Kankonsousai: Japanese society's rituals and the gifting they require

(My apologies again for the infrequent updates recently. I'm still looking for a new home an am as a consequence rather frazzled and busier than usual.)

Today's word is 冠婚葬祭　(かんこんそうさい　kankonsousai). It's made up of 4 kanji characters, as you can see, and each one points to a particular rite of passage in a Japanese person's life:

冠　(かん kan): 元服（げんぶく、げんぷく　genbuku or genfuku)) , or in modern Japanese 成人　(せいじん　seijin) - coming of age, becoming an adult

婚 （こん kon): 婚礼　(こんれい　konrei) - marriage

葬　（そう sou): 葬儀　(そうぎ　sougi) - funeral rites

祭　(さい　sai): - all other festivals and special events

In Japanese society, there are a lot of rules that one is supposed to follow to maintain smooth interpersonal relationships. A large part of that is the giving and receiving of gifts or money on special personal occasions, or 冠婚葬祭. The rules are so complicated that there are books and websites that instruct people what to give, who to give to, how much to give, as well as what to write, how to thank someone, congratulate someone, or send condolences and so on, depending on the occasion and who you are.

Here are some examples:

At New Year's, older relatives are expected to give the children of close relatives お年玉　(おとしだま　otoshidama), a money gift. How much you give depends on the closeness of the relationship, the age of the child, and so on.

When someone dies, one brings an envelope with money when one pays their respects (as well as flowers etc.)

When you move into a new neighborhood, you are expected to introduce yourself to the neighbors on both sides, to the front, and to the back of your new house, but not necessarily to the neighbors diagonally next to your house. (If an apartment, you also introduce yourself to the neighbors above and below you.) You usually bring a small gift of something edible like a box of cookies or similar.

Twice a year, in the summer （お中元　おちゅうげん　ochuugen) and at the end of the year (お歳暮　おせいぼ　oseibo), you are supposed to show your thanks to your boss and other people you are obligated to show gratitude for, by sending them gifts.

When someone gets married, people send them gifts of money rather than things (no bridal registries!)

Gifts are expected for graduation or starting a new level of school, retirement, when a child reaches the age of 3, 5 or 7, and on and on. The recipient also has to give back a thank-you gift to the giftee! (Note: Perhaps surprisingly, birthday gifts are not traditionally given, though they are popular in recent years, like Christmas gifts.)

As you might guess, all of this gifting back and forth is a big business in Japan, and it can get quite expensive. Most people budget a serious chunk of their income for 冠婚葬祭 gifting purposes. But this is just considered a necessary part of living in the society.

Some years ago I picked up an American household money management book in the bargain bin of a bookstore (Barnes & Noble actually) in New York. It wasn't evident from the cover, but it was written for practicing Christians. In the book, the author listed some fixed expenses that she thought every household would have. One of those fixed expenses was for tithing; she recommended 10 to 15% of ones net income. I thought that's a lot to give to your church (disclosure: I grew up with Christian and general Shintoist-Buddhist parents, and as an adult I'm sort of agnostic/non-religious). But then, most Japanese household budget books and articles recommend setting aside a very similar amount of ones income for 冠婚葬祭 expenses, which are also described as お付き合い　(おつきあい　otsukiai), getting-along-with-people, expenses. It may be a stretch to say that interpersonal/societal gifting in Japan is the equivalent of giving to your religious institution, but you could argue that both types of spending help to keep ones place in life more acceptable.

Further reading

• This Japanese site lists a whole bunch of rules to follow for 冠婚葬祭 situations, as well as general etiquette and so on.

Americans are Big and Loud

Japanese people have many prejudices, both good and bad, about 外人　(gaijin foreigners), in general, and アメリカ人　(amerika-jin Americans) in particular.

Here are some adjectives that are often used to describe Americans. You might notice a common thread running through them.

• 大らか　(おおらか　ohraka) - big-hearted, magnanimous, not hung up on little details
• 大声　（おおごえ　ohgoe) - loud - loud literally and loud as in opinionated
• 大げさ　(おおげさ　ohgesa) - exaggerated, exaggerates, over-dramatic.
• 大きい　(おおきい　ohkii) - big, both in height and weight

The kanji 大　which means big is used in all of these phrases as you can see. Americans have the image of being big and loud and overweight and dramatic. I am guessing this is partly a holdover from the post-war period, when American GIs roamed the streets handing out candy to little Japanese kids, and towered over the short Japanese adults. (My father was a kid in the post-war period, and he still has vivid memories of getting chocolate and chewing gum from big GIs.) And while Japanese people are now a lot taller than they used to be, they are generally a lot skinnier at least than most Americans. (Unfortunately, Americans has this image overseas of being very fat, and getting fatter.) In addition, American pop culture, not to mention foreign policy and so on, all contribute to that Big/Loud image.

One thing I've noticed about some (not all) Americans who try very hard to fit into the Japanese culture is that they become the opposite of Big/Loud. One recent example is the African-American (he's part Japanese-American also) enka singer Jero, aka Jerome Charles White, Jr. If you don't know Jero, he's a singer who has taken the world of enka, a traditional form of Japanese pop song, by storm. It's the equivalent of a Japanese singer going to Nashville and topping the country charts. Here he is being profiled on an episode of CNN's Talk Asia program:

Whenever I've seen Jero on TV, he's been quiet, soft spoken, polite, obsequitious - exactly the opposite of his hip-hop image. He might already have been like that before entering the Japanese entertainment world, but his non-Big/Loud image has certainly helped him gain fans, especially amongst the traditional enka fan base of middle-aged and older people, especially women. Whether he will help to change the Big/Loud stereotype of Americans, only time will tell.

Japanese people and poo

Bodily wastes are a taboo subject in most cultures, but not that much in Japan. In fact, the subject of poo, or the lack thereof (as in constipation) is discussed fairly openly in polite society.

There are many different ways of calling poo. When it's on the hard side, it's called うんこ　(unko), while the softer kind is called うんち　(unchi). These are both informal and rather cute terms; the formal term (the equivalent of feces in English) is 便 （べん　ben)　or　大便　(だいべん　daiben). This combines the kanji for 'big' with 'ben'. Another word for it (a bit rude) is 糞　(くそ　kuso), also read as ふん　fun. くそ　is also a swear word, like 'shit' in English, but milder in terms of shock value.

On J-List they have several cute unchi (poo) goods, including a pink unchi pencil topper mascot. Kawaii poo: Only in Japan?

Here's a mysterious yet colorful video about 'The unchi of love'.

Constipation, a problem that is considered to be quite critical for ones health, is called 便秘　(べんぴ　ben-pi). This combines the kanji 'ben' with the one that means secret or hidden. So constipation is your body secreting or hiding your poo. Makes sense, doesn't it?

The opposite problem, diarrhea, is called 下痢 （げり　geri). Some people get snickery about the male English name Gary, since it sort of sounds like 下痢.

The formal names for urine are 尿　(にょう　nyou)　or 小便　(しょうべん　shouben - 'small' ben as opposed to 'big' ben for poo). Informally it's called しょんべん　(shonben)　or (especially by kids) おしっこ　(oshikko).

As far as I know though, there are no kawaii pee mascots.

(Edit: Apparently there is a poo and pee doll pair, though they are Scandinavian, not Japanese: see a picture (thanks Sile...I think ^_^;)